10 things people say that aren't meant to be insults, but ARE:

 Well, maybe some of them ARE meant to be insults.  You decide:

1.  "Are you feeling very well today?"  (Meaning to you:  "You sure are grouchy!")

2.  "Wow!  You lost weight!  You look great!"  (What you hear:  "You were so fat before! It's great you did something about that!")

Barney Fife

3.  "That makeup makes your skin look remarkable"! (You think they said to you:  "It's about time you covered up those black circles and eye bags!  You look like Barney Fife!")

4.  "You don't need to be concerned about that..."  (Meaning:  "Get out of my business.")

5.  "Would you like a mint?"  (You think they said to you::  "Your breath smells like the dead rat in the back of the garage.")

6.  "Did you just wash your hair?"  (Meaning:  "Your hair is a grease bomb!")

7.  When you call someone and the person on the other line immediately says, "What's up?"  (What you hear:  "OK, give it to me straight and hurry up and get it over with because I'm busy and can't be bothered...")

8.   "Oh, I'm sorry, I can't met up today...it will probably have to be in a couple of weeks.  I'll call you!"  (What you hear:  "I am so IMPORTANT.  Us IMPORTANT people do not have a lot of extra time to visit.")

9.  "Oh!  You got your hair cut!" (Meaning:  "What did you do to your hair?!")

10.  "So, are you tired?" (Implied:  "...or are you just ugly?")*



*Credit for this one given to my friend, Lisay, who dreamt that someone said this to her.  It affected her throughout the rest of Junior High.  T-shirts on sale soon.  Stay tuned!

UPDATE: 

T-SHIRTS NOW AVAILABLE!

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

Did you know that up to 95% of physical health issues are a direct result of your thought life?

In the following video and transcript, neuroscientist Dr. Caroline Leaf explains to Sid Roth from "It's Supernatural" how our minds are wired for love.This is what they have found in the laboratory. When we think a bad thought, when we make bad choices and we hang on to anything that is negative: anger, abuse, irritation, frustration, all the negative sides of emotions, a physical change occurs in your brain which hijacks the way in which our brains are actually wired.

DR. LEAF:  Because we’re spirit, soul, body and it’s our soul area, which is literally the brain insulating the will and the emotions that is processing and boding all these thoughts into real things, so structural changes are happening in the brain. And whatever is going on in the soul will affect the spirit and will affect the body. So if our mind is filled, our thoughts, our mind is all filled with chaos, chaos will reign in our bodies. So, you know, the science of finding out that 87 to 95% of current of mental, physical and emotional illnesses come from our thought life.

Dr Leaf says that our thoughts actually are taking up "real estate" in our brain.  We tend to think our thoughts are harmless. But every time we listen and think about things it results in choices that you make, which will result in thoughts or memories that we build. Scientifically, a thought looks like a tree.

DR. LEAF:  That process in an unconscious mind is building memory as we’re speaking. So every single thing that you hear, everything that comes into your brain through your five senses converts, we think about it and then we make choices, and it converts into a structural thing in your brain, which is a thought, and they look like trees. And that’s why the scientists refer to the forest of the magic trees of the mind because that’s what it looks like in your mind. Now you have about a hundred billion nerve cells in your brain. That’s a lot of nerve cells. But each nerve cell can grow up to 200,000 branches. So that means we have around three million years plus worth of space in our brain to build memories.

As humans we are wired for all the positive stuff. Therefore, we have like a little chemical factory in our brain. In order to grow these branches we have all this input going into our brains, which is like electricity. Then the brain will secrete chemicals and you have this electrical chemical reaction, and when that happens branches grow, and these branches are all holding the memory that’s related and it’s all grouped together in that tree. So that’s a whole network related to one kind of thought. And then to build that, there are needed chemicals. So now we’re wired for love, which means that we are, and that’s not just the love, love in terms of relationships. It’s love in terms of happiness, joy, peace, passion, excitement, truth, and all the wonderful stuff. We have chemicals we secrete for each of those. If I’m building a memory and it’s a great exciting thing, like now, building them now as we talk about what we’re interested in, what will happen is the brain would secrete excitement and passion chemicals. But now let’s say, for example, something negative happens and you shift out of excitement into negativity, some kind of negative thing, lack of excitement, lack of passion, the opposite. The brain doesn’t have a chemical for that. So it will take the closest positive and secrete more and more, and more, and more throw the brain out of disorder in order to try and find lack of excitement. And then you’ve got to have chemicals. So it takes too much of the good chemical. Still builds the tree, but now we have an electrical chemical imbalance in this area.

Here is a little dialogue between Sid and Dr. Leaf:

SID: And isn’t it amazing, Caroline, that the scientists like yourself have now come up with a conclusion that our brain was originally wired for love, not, this is an example of a toxic brain, that’s toxic thoughts. Do you know every time I look at that, Caroline, I’m gonna remember it and I am going to watch what I say, what I think and give no place to anything that’s gonna kill or steal, or destroy. So we’re wired for love. Tell me about that.

DR. LEAF: Well I just think it’s incredible. That’s a scientists’ term, by the way. They say “wired for love” and they therefore say that we learn fear, and that’s very significant, Sid, because God tells us not to fear, and we know that God is a God of love, so fear is the highjack. So that’s a spiritual principle, two opposite spiritual forces. But in science it’s the same thing. As humans we are wired for all the positive stuff. Therefore, we have like a little chemical factory in our brain. In order to grow these branches we have all this input going into our brains, which is like electricity. Then the brain will secrete chemicals and you have this electrical chemical reaction, and when that happens branches grow, and these branches are all holding the memory that’s related and it’s all grouped together in that tree. So that’s a whole network related to one
kind of thought. And then to build that, there are needed chemicals. So now we’re wired for love, which means that we are, and that’s not just the love, love in terms of relationships. It’s love in terms of happiness, joy, peace, passion, excitement, truth, and all the wonderful stuff. We have chemicals we secrete for each of those. If I’m building a memory and it’s a great exciting thing, like now, building them now as we talk about what we’re interested in, what will happen is the brain would secrete excitement and passion chemicals. But now let’s say, for example, something negative happens and you shift out of excitement into negativity, some kind of negative thing, lack of excitement, lack of passion, the opposite. The brain doesn’t have a chemical for that. So it will take the closest positive and secrete more and more, and more, and more throw the brain out of disorder in order to try and find lack of excitement. And then you’ve got to have chemicals. So it takes too much of the good chemical. Still builds the tree, but now we have an electrical chemical imbalance in this area.

SID: So that’s why someone might get depressed.

DR. LEAF: Exactly, exactly, because when we have an electrical chemical imbalance around
this, this is ugly. It causes inflammation in the brain. So around this area--

SID: Well what about when doctors test you for heart conditions and things and they say you have too much inflammation? Does that start in the thoughts that go to the brain, that affect the body?

DR. LEAF: Definitely, because spirit, soul, and body are linked. So the mind body connection, it’s very clear. And that’s why doctors say 87 to 95% of illnesses, cardiovascular, immune system, all the different disorders that can happen. And all of us will manifest differently, are a direct result of your thought life. Because what happens is that your body will take this thought in your brain and will translate this thought into a physical reaction in your body, and all of us will respond differently. Now wherever there is highjack in the body’s order, because God is a God of order, the body functions on the principles of order, and very, very, very organized. So when order is thrown out, when electrical chemical balance is thrown out the result will be inflammation. Inflammation causes the immune system to start sending out all kinds of cells to try and sort this out.

SID: These alternative health doctors and medical doctors, they have medicine and they have alternative things to treat inflammation. But all that’s doing is masking the symptoms that causes those thoughts.

DR. LEAF: Well it’s a combination. It is. The cause is the thoughts. You know, you have to, there are doctors that are saying, listen, you’ve got to deal with your thought life. There’s research showing that medication doesn’t even work that well unless you actually have your thought life under control.

SID: But wait a second. You said 95% is connected with that. So forget that 5%. That 95 is what concerns me. Now we’re wired for love, but most people are walking in fear. What happens when the body goes into fear or stress?

DR. LEAF: Well then what happens there is that fear is a choice that we’ve made. So when life is coming in at us we’re thinking building thoughts, and those thoughts are I’m scared, I’m anxious, I’m whatever,  negative, and this incident happened, and it’s built and it’s wired in. Whenever you think so, there’s a  physical structural change in your brain, if it’s in this negative direction, your body then, this thought thing, this state, is translated by your brain into physical reaction in our body. That is stress.

SID: Okay. You know, I have in my notes here that there are 1400 chemical and physical responses when you go into fear and stress.

DR. LEAF: Absolutely. What happens is--

SID: 1400?

DR. LEAF: That’s a lot. That’s a lot.

SID: How do we stop this? I mean, why did Jesus keep saying, “Fear not, fear not, fear not.” He knew he didn’t want you to know those 1400 chemical, physical responses that go immediately throughout your brain and your entire body.

DR. LEAF: The entire body. It throws your body into chemical chaos. You see, what you get is three stages of stress. Stage one is a normal stage. That’s what you use when you are alert, focused, building memory. So it’s a good positive thing. It’s called eustress. Those 1400 chemical reactions and the 30 different hormones that flow then, flow in order. So we have beautiful trees being built. You’ll have a healthy green tree being built. But when we go into the fear side, the hijack happens, we make a bad choice, then the brain is trying to secrete and find that chemical so it secretes the wrong amount. It throws the entire electrical chemical balance out. So those 1400 chemical reactions move from being a positive thing into a negative thing and we have chemical chaos.

SID: Okay. Is there hope for me?

DR. LEAF:  There is hope for all of us...

Click HERE to READ the transcript, which is downloaded from Sid Roth's website:  or check out the video below:

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

Sheesh! What's WRONG with my Brain??!!!

I've always been a Clodhopper.  Clodhop here, clodhop there.  At least, that's what I was called by my sister.  She even gave me the pet name "Sasquatch".  Being from the Pacific Northwest, we knew what that was before we even knew what the boogie man was.  I called her "Hamburger Head", so I guess we were even.

I have always had a problem with my balance, and always have been a "rocker".  Even a friend of mine wrote about me in her biography, Angels and Pawprints: A Lifetime of Love, Laughter, and Tears.  Her son was a "rocker", too.  When I sit, I rock back and forth, and when I stand I rock back and forth.  Kids would call me "duck", or say that I had a "rocking chair in my head", or that I was a "penguin".  Now that makes for a nice self-image.  As if being shy wasn't bad enough...

I also had some embarrassing moments, which I now think are funny.  When I was older I would ride the bus to work, and one day had to carry a few things under my arms.  I pulled the bell to stop the bus, and got up before the bus was actually stopped, like you're supposed to do.  I was trying to be so very assured of myself, but for the life of me when that bus came to a stop, I kept moving -- but not forward.  I fell to left of me and landed on some lady's lap.  I was looking right up into her face and said sheepishly, "Sorrr-yyyy".   I got off feeling like such a Clodhopper.

When I would be walking and someone yelled at me from somewhere, I would stumble.  One day, in college, I was trying to stay composed while walking into the cafeteria to get seconds of stew.  I LOVE stew.  As I stepped over into the mess hall, my feet went out from under me and I fell at the feet of a dude I kinda had a sorta crush on at the time.  He said, "So, you're falling for me, eh?"  Can you say "RED FACE?"  Or even better, "MY FACE IS GROWING BIGGER AT THE MOMENT!"  After composing myself, getting back to my table and finishing my stew, I was taking the tray back to where you take the trays back, someone said my name, and guess what?  I went down again.  Yes.  Clodhopper R Us.  Well...ME.  What's WRONG with me??!!

I was always falling and spraining my ankles.  I have even broken my left leg two times because I was just walking down a couple of measly hills and lost my balance.  One break was a compound fracture that was so awful that it almost sent the friend who was caring for me over the bridge we were on.

Even when I would perform in front of people singing, I would wonder why I would have to THINK about standing there or I would fall down.  I often have to THINK about even just walking.  What's WRONG with my BRAIN???  Yes, I am a Clodhopper.

For the last couple of years I had been experiencing a series of dizziness spells that I couldn't explain.  I would get so dizzy that I would actually get nauseous, and I couldn't explain why.  When I was driving I would sometimes get dizzy and have to pull over the car.  WEIRD.  Then, one day, while making candy with J-GQ, I felt my eyes go CRAZY!  They were actually rolling around in my head and I knew I was experiencing true vertigo.  I turned away from J-GQ and hung on to the sink, because I didn't want him to look at his mom morphing into a monster. Plus, I needed to hold on to something or I would fall down.   I called for My Boyfriend, and he took me to the ER.  Nothing wrong. 

However, I kept experiencing this dizziness, and finally went back to the ENT.  I had been there in the past, but he didn't really take me seriously.  He might as well have shrugged me off by telling me I just had Irritable Bowel Syndrome and there was nothing anyone could do about it.  I'd heard that one too many times before.

But, I went back to his partner, and told him my story, and told him that his buddy in the other room really didn't do too much to help me the last time.  So, to satisfy and humor me, he decided to schedule me for a test which determined balance function in the ears and also an MRI.

I went in for the balance test and they had kept telling me that I would need someone to drive me home because I would feel extra dizzy and sick to my stomach after the test was complete.  Well, after the test was complete I felt nothing, so I told My Boyfriend, "Well, that was a waste of time", because I obviously had nothing wrong with me there.  Then I went into my MRI.

When I went back to the ENT to get the test results, I knew what he was going to say -- it was nothing and I was probably just experiencing IBS.  However, what he said was actually quite a shock, and I had to ask him to repeat it.  He said, "Well, you have NO balance function in your left ear and very limited function in your right ear.  In addition, you have a 3 inch cyst on your brain, so I would like you to see a neurologist."  Excuse me???  What?!!!  Come to find out, the cyst was an arachnoid cyst, was benign, and had been there since birth, and the balance function had also most likely occurred when I was a small child.

So, he sent me on my way and hooked me up with the neurologist and also the physical therapist.  The neuro said that the cyst was a factor in my balance and showed me how it was impeding into my brain.  He said they typically don't grown, but he HAD seen them grow, so would like to do follow-up MRI'S.  This was the strangest thing I had ever heard!  And, the physical therapist said she said she was surprised that I was even able to stand up and asked if I slept a lot.  I said, "YEAAAAAH"  She said that people who love people with balance issues cannot understand why they sleep so much -- it's because much of their effort is being put into just staying upright.  I could relate.  My Boyfriend could never understand why I slept so much.

I was FREEEEEEE!  I finally had an answer to my CLODHOPPER-ness!  I had an answer as to why I rocked -- I am trying to equalize myself!  I had an answer as to why, if my hair gets in my eyes I cannot move.  I had an answer as to why I cannot walk up bleachers, walk down the stairs at a movie theater without holding onto a handrail, why I have to think about walking, why I get overwhelmed in grocery stores or with crowds of people, or why I stopped offering to help people in their kitchen after dinner because I didn't want to break something.

So, now, I have an excuse.  I try not to use it too often, but if you ask me to come help you clean up your house, I might say...."Sorry, I have a cyst on my brain."  And I won't be lying.

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

One Remarkable Poem

 A poem entitled:

A Poem I Wrote To My Friend Lisa, Who Is a Former Roommate, and Who Has A Son Who Is Two Months Older Than My Son, And We Have Another Ex-Roommate Named Laurie Who Also Has A Son Who Was Born Between Lisa's Son and My Son and Who Are All Big Boys Now

I wonder if you saw those pics

Of our boys who played with sticks,

They are so cute and so much fun

...I'm sure glad I got me one!

They're growing up and getting big,

And soon will eat just like a pig,

And grow so big and tall and strong

Just like we knew all along.

They make us laugh our buttsies off

And when I laugh it makes me cough

(I gotta get that problem fixed,

And taking Nexium should do the trick),

They will soon be liking girls,

Which will make us want to hurl,

And they will want to take our car

And we will wonder where they are.

They will soon go out on dates

And make us stay up late to wait.

But if they find a girl like us

We'll know it was worth all the fuss.

Amen.

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

I want to be ASTONISHING...

...to Jesus.

I know that might sound weird, but as I was reading through Matthew 7, I came across a verse (verse 10), which got my attention. I don't know if I remember seeing that before.

The story begins with a centurion (a Roman guard) approaching Jesus and told him about his servant, who was lying at home paralyzed and greatly suffering. Servants in those days were often times as close as a person's own family, and this was breaking this man up. Jesus looked at the man and told him, "I will go and heal him". But, the centurion stopped him and said, "No! You don't actually have to GO to my house, just say something!" He went on to say that he understood authority, since he was under authority himself and he also had subjects under him. He knew that all Jesus needed to was to "tell him to be healed and he will be!"

Jesus looked at this man in amazement. Verse 10 says, "When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following, "I'm not lying...I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith." After a few more comments, he told the centurion, "Go! He's going to be healed!" And he WAS, within the hour.

Here was a man who was of high-standing. He could have walked right up to Jesus and demanded Jesus to heal his servant, but he didn't. He could have said something disdainful in an attempt to put Jesus to shame, but he didn't. He knew that he was a man who had a need, even though he was a very capable, powerful individual. And he submitted to Jesus. He had faith that Jesus was who He said He was, and he didn't even question it.

In the midst of his own trial, not even any of Jesus' known "followers" had more faith in Jesus eyes than this man. He had more faith than those who followed Jesus every day of his life. He was not a man in the "inner circle".

Jesus honors our faith -- no matter who we are. And as someone who follows Jesus, I want to have the faith of this centurion -- and I want to be ASTONISHING to Jesus by my faith in Him.

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

20 things to do to grow your NICE quotient -- and to spread it on...

In a world that is becoming more and more mean-spirited, it would be behoove us to step back and think about what it means to really be nice. And, when we are nice, it is contagious. Here are a few suggestions I've come up with that we can all do today:


1. Smile at a child.

2. Pay for the person's toll behind you.

3. When someone starts to gossip about someone, say something nice about that person instead and change the subject.

4. Make someone's favorite cookies for no reason.

5. Make someone feel good about themselves.

6. Post on someone's facebook wall just to let them know you are thinking about them.

7. Send a note in your child's lunch sack.

8. Tell someone you will pray for them, and then do.

9. Pray for someone you don't particularly like.

10. Wave and smile at someone who has let you into the car line.

11. Offer to let someone go before you at the grocery store.

12. Tell the waiter/waitress or grocery clerk how well they are doing and you appreciate their hard work.

13. Send someone a note who has done something nice for you, but you never told them.

14. Ask a new artist, author or blogger how you can help them promote their work and be successful.

15. Say something funny to the grocery clerk.

16. Treat your child like you would a friend's child.

17. Treat your husband like someone you are trying to impress.

18. Offer to help someone move or organize a room in their home.

19. Open a door for someone, and give them a sincere smile.

20. Say "Excuse me!" when you walk in front of someone.


I realize that most of these might be obvious, but it is amazing how we often forget in the midst of our business to do the small things.  I guarantee that when we make and EFFORT to be kind, others respond IN KIND, and the world is a better place to live!

Please leave comments for other things that you think are NICE! God bless!

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

Why is it ...

that some people don't turn to God until He is all they have left?

Why is it that we don't turn to God FIRST, and then we have everything else?

I guess it is because as Human Beings we feel the need and have been taught our whole lives to be in control, and we don't want to have to depend on something other than ourselves.

But, I also know that each one of us needs a purpose. We need to know what our design is. How are we to know that unless we inquire of the One who actually made us in the first place?

To some people this is simplistic and even sophomoric. But, that is the beauty of God. He is awesome (and I don't use that word lightly) and He is SIMPLE. He wants to reveal His mysteries to us Humans. He does this through Jesus, "in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." (Colossians 2:3) Sounds mystical. It is.

I always wanted to write a song about a person who came to know God because of all of the good things that happened in their lives. I didn't know of anyone like that until I met my husband, even though God's goodness is all around us. But, most people come to the end of their rope before they look up, and hopefully right into the eyes of Jesus, who only wants to love them, not judge, show them their purpose, and give them, most importantly, life abundantly -- being completely and utterly forgiven.

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET

You know what makes me sad...?

Yellow doesn't make me sad. But when my son, J-GQ, is sick, I feel sad. My child is sick today.

You wouldn't think I was sad, though, because today at the doctor's office he was the one acting like the adult. I was texting some old friends I worked with at Continental Singers, and I was laughing my head off while he was sitting there on the table being miserable. He kept shaking his head. And rolling his eyes. As the friend I was texting said, "That's what teens do." Even when the doctor came in, I was finishing up my text and he probably thought I was the most disengaged mom.

So, my son has the flu. Yuck. But, he's handling it like a man (which isn't really saying a whole lot, because most men are little babies when they are sick. Except my Chump. He's not a woosy baby when he's sick -- he just wants everyone to stay away from him.)

J-GQ is not whining or complaining. He's a tough kid (but not of heart). And that makes me glad.

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CHICKY GROOVY COOLNESS GADGET